do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
