By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
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