Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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