I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
