its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
