i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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