sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize