I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
