I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize
