after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
