How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
