She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Randomize
