and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Randomize
