sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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