the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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