Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
