Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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