We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
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