we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
