Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
