come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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