I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
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