Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
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