Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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