i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
