I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
