is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
