I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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