5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
