Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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