Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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