Whats the glycemic index on semen?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Two words: nipple clamps
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