I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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