I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
