Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
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