You really coming over, don't trick.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
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