WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize
