Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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