nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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