Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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