The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Randomize