how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Randomize
