I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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