ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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