God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
The best revenge is premature balding
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Randomize