I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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