So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Randomize
