she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
