i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
