She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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