Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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